Breakfast Letters: speed bump

Breakfast Letters: speed bump: The cup of tea I am currently sipping is a perfect taste and texture. It is not always so. If I have sugar cubes then yes, it is perfect eve...

speed bump

The cup of tea I am currently sipping is a perfect taste and texture. It is not always so. If I have sugar cubes then yes, it is perfect every time but with a spoonful not so much. My cat is purring and I would be too if I could.

I would like to tell you about what I saw in a parking lot yesterday as I was driving through. It is a new addition to the lot at least in the last few weeks. There have always been these huge black lumps that lay across the main drive along the store fronts. They are painted with white stripes at a diagonal so as to be seen. I see them. I know they are there. I have always known they were speed bumps. I have to remember as far back as I can and yes they have always been called or known to me as speed bumps. I must have been the anomaly because now on the front side of every one of these speed bumps or so I thought they were speed bumps, is painted in big bold clear white lettering. SPEED BUMP Ohhhhh…. So that is what those are! Really? Who knew this until now? How much money did this cost?  Has some law been passed that states all speed bumps must be clearly marked with the words speed bump? Because as I am driving at 48mph through a parking lot I want to be able to pause long enough to read speed bump on a bump before I ram into it and damage my car. Did some foolish judge or jury or attorney really try this case? Did some idiot actually sue someone over their decision to ignore obvious speed bumps? Did it happen in the midst of committing a crime? Did they steal a load of items from TJ MAXX and then damage their vehicle while getting away on a speed bump which caused them to get caught? I would love to hear the mouse ran up the clock story behind this; probably as ridiculous as the hot coffee McDonald incident.  Do not get me started.

A girl  and her boyfriend had a quarrel ( yes ickie there are several different things that two or more people can do that is not really fighting!!!!!) she stated  to him that he was acting like an alien boyfriend.  LOL…(I totally get where she would think that I have dated aliens before myself). You will never believe what he did. http://sanantonio.craigs list.org/mis/2618786879.html  this is where he wrote the letter to her. I am sharing this because he wrote and posted it on a public forum.  This has got to be the cutest thing ever! This man knows how to create a fix in a big way. It is clever. Some of you may not be surprised by clever in a man but we are. I take that back for a second. Bluegrass and Bourbon was pretty damn clever! Anyway please follow the post and enjoy. 

Breakfast Letters: toothpick

Breakfast Letters: toothpick: One of the emails I receive is a newsletter from a religious leader. This morning it started out with “We're all watching the markets this m...

toothpick

One of the emails I receive is a newsletter from a religious leader. This morning it started out with “We're all watching the markets this morning after a tumultuous weekend of economic news.” Uh…No….No…we are NOT all watching the markets. I have absolutely no control over it. Watching it does not impact it. I did not even bother to read the whole thing. Something about storing treasure came to mind and I moved on.  

I have held back for as long as I can. Get the bloody tooth pick out of your mouth!!! ReallY!! Disgusting! It is NOT attractive and we, the people do not wish to see you pick at your teeth. REALLY!!!! I do not care if the meeting is formal or informal speaking with a piece of wood gathered up in the corner of your mouth is beyond annoying. STOP For the love of air STOP!!!  You are slouched back in your chair looking bored out of your mind, you do not remove your cap, and you stare off into a space beyond the room and look at no one. Not even when you speak do you look at the person you are addressing. You sit in a lump and are disgruntled because you “feel” you deserve respect but you do not bother to treat anyone else with any. I have no desire to attend any further meeting you may be at. I have tried to be nice. I have been calm and good natured. I believed (silly me) that you were just uncomfortable and would come around. There is nothing to come around to….(silly me) this is how you are. I shall let you be. I do not have to be around you so I will not.  You and your toothpick (has been in your mouth all day?) go in peace.

Dear people please do not attend meetings with a toothpick in your mouth. We the other people at the meeting do not want to see it. REALLY

I received a reported sighting of Horatio. He was seen at an apartment complex off of 410. Linoleuming is what the agent reported. Somehow I do not believe Horatio would be on his hands and knees gluing down squares of linoleum. I believe some other possibilities exist such as he was visiting a friend, woman, mother, kids. He was doing his job, investigating a murder/crime scene. Perhaps he was thinking about renting me an apartment and was taking the tour to see if was classy enough. Maybe that is where he was staked out while he was watching you watch him.

I should be on a flight this morning. I should be in L.A. by 10. I am not. I could have had a glorious week in beautiful California on the beach all day, up at Bear Lake house hunting, touring the local wineries, watching the yachts come and go while sipping a cocktail on the balcony of a wonderful restaurant in Long Beach. Enjoying the Pub at Seal Beach….. Travelocity you let me down.

I will be arranging my database for prospective clients into groups today…woohoo! I have over 200 and my first client did not come from my database. I need 1 big huge account with a steady stream of needs and a whole file full of little ones. I have Christmas cards ready for you to order. Call me!

Breakfast Letters: Pens

Breakfast Letters: Pens: Pens travel. Has anyone else noticed this odd phenomenon? I had three pens in a basket I keep by my chair. There is a bookmark, the three pe...

Pens

Pens travel. Has anyone else noticed this odd phenomenon? I had three pens in a basket I keep by my chair. There is a bookmark, the three pens, a highlighter, my gratitude journal, my devotional book, a cloth to clean my glasses (just to read with), and my worn out falling apart dream book. I use the pens on my journal and for dream interpretation. Well, they have one by one vanished from the basket. I was at a client’s office and she nor could her assistant locate a pen. They had brought a few extra from their homes but those as well vanished. Where do all the pens go? Is there like a Pied Piper of pens out there? Does he just wander the Earth and pipe to a different place each night? Are the pen piper and the sock piper related? I have heard that some kids lose their retainers and glasses.  Is this the work of other pipers?

I am running out of tea bags. I have been using one Ceylon and one white bag in my morning pot of tea and just Ceylon at tea time to help prolong the eventual run-out of tea for me. This morning I had two white and one Ceylon. I used the white and saved the Ceylon for this afternoon. As I have stated in other letters I add colored sugar to my bowl of sugar to make it pretty. I had black sugar crystals in the bowl. Well this morning I added the one and a half spoonful of sugar and poured the very, very pale tea in the cup. The tea changed into a ghoulish green. Hmmmmm……. I stirred, it looked like a potion cooked up by a witch. I poured in the cream. I now had a pale mystic looking greenish grey, cloudy steaming beverage. Perfect for a Halloween tea; odd for my breakfast tea. I am glad I am not pregnant and prone to morning sickness. I closed my eyes, (why do we do this?) and took a sip. It tasted like my tea but then not. I have a brilliant opportunity here to believe this tea is something other than what it is and that is what it will be. Welcome back this piece of Tamara, I have missed you so very much.

Do you think the manna from Heaven for the Israelites had different flavors every day? Toasty oatmeal one day, clove flavored apple the next, buttery corn the following? The story does not say it did not, nor does it say it did. What would your GOD flavor your manna with? 

Breakfast Letters: Smile

Breakfast Letters: Smile: I had one of those “can’t get comfortable” nights of sleep and when I finally did the alarm went off. I had a conversation with myself about...