PG Her Tips

Having dinner in a pub and there are two women seated across from us. They decide to have tea after dinner. So they ask for tea. The waitress asks them what type (not what brand) and they both agree they want PG Tips. The waitress is of course dumbfounded. She has never heard of this type of tea. She goes to check and returns saying they do not have PG Tips. They have Earl Grey, Chamomile and some English Breakfast. These two women blow a gasket and start demanding what type of pub does not carry PG Tips? They are rude about it. This is America. Pubs are not legally bound to carry tea let alone PG Tips. Not everybody like PG Tips. I myself am very partial to Yorkshire Gold.

To your comment "What kind of British Pub does not have British Tea?"  Tea is NOT British! It is not grown there! It is not harvested there nor is it always packaged and boxed there. It is imported by British tea merchants!

There were firemen at the intersection with their boots in hand dancing for money. Yes these charming men were dancing right there in the intersection for money so I gave them some. Or I should say I demanded my date give me a dollar. He did!

While at dinner I ordered the beer special it was some concoction called Staropramen and it was served with an orange slice. It was very golden and cloudy. Tasted of toasted wheat anda bit of citrus. It was like drinking summertime. The beer is created from a recipe first created in 1884 in Prague. Delicious!!

Yesterday we passed through Flatonia. What kind of name for a city is that? No it is not flat. Flatonia was established in 1873. It is named after a pioneer merchant named F. W. Flato. It was an important stop for the San Antonio - Arkansas Railway and the San Antonio - Galveston Railway. Flatonia became a thriving city with the building of a Swift meat packing plant, ice factory, and cotton gins.  I believe his name is Frederick Wilhelm Flato.

Dear male creature in the red truck...TURN ALready!!!!!

No Cat Litter Creates Havoc

I have not written a rant in a while but I have been living in a Roadrunner comedy and I am Wile E Coyote. Things have been falling on my head, exploding around me and everything from A.C.M.E. is defective. 

Let me start with the two male creatures at the local grocery store.  The two on the lift, the two who are subcontracted by the contractor from where, the parking lot of Home Depot? I live in Texas you bumbleheads. I have since 1974 I understand enough Tex-Mex to know what you said. My guess is I am slightly older than you which means I deserve respect. Would you talk like that to your Grandmother, aunt, daughter, Mother? Guess what? I am a Grandmother, aunt, daughter and mother. I am also some-one's sister.  

I will next move on to the female creature at the same grocery store who cashed me out. I greeted you with a friendly "Good Morning Miss Lily" and then you slammed my groceries around. What the bloody hell did my bread and conditioner do to you?  For that matter what did I do to you? Oh and now because some lazy, uneducated miscreant tapes a coupon on the wrong bottle you look at me as though I am attempting to steal your purse. It is 50 cents!! It is conditioner.  I needed it.  I do not care about the bloody coupon. "If there is a problem with the coupon do not use it" I tell her. "They are taped all over the various bottles of shampoo and conditioner right over there." She glares at me. WTF???? "NO, it is fine!" She hisses. I am a female, I know what that means. The female bagging my things slinks off looking a bit scared. I gently pick up my things and turn toward her. I can only assume she did not like being called Miss Lily so, I say "Thank you Miss Lily" smile cheerfully and walk away. I have always greeted people who serve me in some way either as Miss (insert their name if I know it) or Mommie if I do not. It is respect.  Maybe I should have said "Thanks ho". 

Yesterday a bird, duck, buzzard or pterodactyl deposited a load of shite on my car. (Yes Pam I said shite!!!) Then a miracle from GOD appears on my facebook page. It says... WHENEVER A BIRD SHITS ON MY CAR, I EAT A PLATE OF SCRAMBLED EGGS ON MY FRONT PORCH, JUST TO LET THEM KNOW WHAT I'M CAPABLE OF. This had me laughing all day. All day. Apparently not one of my 500 friends found this funny. 

Last night at about 10:30 I am making the rounds to lock the doors when a black ground beetle crawls under the door. I stomp it, smash it, stomp it some more then being overly tired and fatigued I toddle off to bed. I get up this morning to pick up the carcass and throw it away and it is gone. I am  sure neither the cats nor the dog ate it. So, either it survived my attack or it's comrades came and hauled it off. Either scenario is NOT good. 

The reason I am the grocery store this early was because at 6:45 AM I emptied the cat litter. At 6:46 AM I realize I have no litter to replace it.  Who does that??

D Trump does not like the butts of the Kardashians or J Lo? 

 He dislikes firm round butts? 

This made top of the fold news. Really??  Who cares about his taste in females? Is that news worthy? Are any of you men reading this going to be influenced by D Trumps opinion? If so STOP reading this now!!  If he wants to date stick people he can. Do it D!! You wear a red tie that makes you look like a V-jj. I think that says it all. Nothing about a red tie says power to me it says 'Look I am a woman!!  But power on little man. Wear your red tie.  I can only assume your dislike of the curve of a bottom stems from the size of your package.  But, to be honest this is good news and good to know. I have no fear of your Suaron Eye gazing in my direction. 

This has been helpful. I must now take my contraband conditioner and wash my hair. 

Private Aaron Battin II

Grammy told me a few months ago that she remembered tales of her Great Grandfather who had been in the Civil War but she could not remember the details other than he was with Sherman when he took Atlanta and marched with him to the sea.  I will tell you about Aaron Battin II.

Aaron was born in 1846 in Ohio. He was named after his father Aaron Battin and was one of 9 children.
He enlisted on August 4 1862 at the age of 16 in Ohio and on September 10 1862 he was assigned to 92 Infantry Regiment, Company C as a Private in the Union Army.  The young men who enlisted were reported to be quick to learn, energetic, from good family names and proud. There were 949 men in the 92 regiment. Company C was stationed to garrison Gallipolis Ohio. On October 7  Company C was ordered to Point Pleasant Virginia. On October 14 they were marched to Charleston, West Virginia. January 1 1863 they moved to Colesworth, West Virginia days later they moved to Nashville, Tennessee. From June 23 to July 7 the were engaged in skirmishes in and around Tullahoma, Tennessee culminating in the Battle at Hoover's Gap, a Union Victory. In August and September they fought in the battle of Chickamauga near Chattanooga, Tennessee. This was a victory for the Confederates.

 In October, "Operation Cracker Line" commenced. The goal was to free and open up Brown's Ferry on the Tennessee River and allow the passage of food, weapons, reinforcements and other supplies to flow to the interior of Tennessee for the Union Troops via the "Cracker Line". This was a well planned operation and would have gone very well if the Confederates had not noticed all the careful preparations. This left them with one choice, a surprise night attack.  The noise of battle was heard by the Union Troops at Brown's Ferry and 2 divisions were sent as reinforcements. The confederates soon fell back and the Union won the day. Night battles were seldom fought during the Civil War but this one ranked as one the most significant. 572 soldiers died during the Battle for Brown's Fery.

                                                      Chattanooga - Civil War era
In November General Sherman arrived with 4 divisions and a huge Union offense began. They captured Orchard Knob, Lookout Mountain, and Missionary Ridge. Chattanooga at last belonged to the Union Army and Sherman made it his base of operations as he prepared for the Atlanta campaign. It was a Union victory with a loss of  5815 Union soldiers and 6667 Confederate soldiers.

In February 1864 in preparation for his southward assault General Sherman launched an assault on an important Confederate railroad center. He had hoped that they were disorganized and weak with the loss of several divisions from other skirmishes. He was wrong. The union withdrew back toward Vicksburg. It was a Confederate victory.

                                                            Buzzards Roost Gap 1864

The tales told of Great Grandpa Battin center around a scar on his left side. Mother does not remember the details of the scar, how it looked or how he got it or even where it is on his left side; maybe nobody does but we do know when he got it.  There is a long high mountain called Rocky Face Ridge in Georgia, which General Sherman refereed to as "the doors of death"  and it was in this mountain range that General Johnston entrenched his Confederate troops to protect the Western Atlantic Railroad where it passed through a place known as Buzzards Roost. General Sherman decided to test their resolve and sent in two column of troops after him, one of them being the 92 Regiment, Company C. On May 9 at Buzzards Roost, a gap in the mountains known also as Mill Creek Gap fighting broke out and it was during this battle that Private Aaron Battin II was wounded.  That was in May of 1864. 11 battles and several hundred miles later we find Aaron Battin and Company C in Washington DC. It is June 19 1864 and he is being mustered out of the Army.
Aaron left Ohio in 1878 and moved to West Virginia where he began farming. He later became a lumber inspector. He died in 1933, the cause of death on the certificate says Senility. Grammy was a year old, he was 87.

                                                 Aaron Battin II is the seated gentlman
My guess is he had some tales he could tell.

Love Some Samuel!!!

Dear Capital One,
We arrived and eagerly assembled inside where we hoped to be serviced by Samuel L. Jackson. On first glimpse he was not at a teller window. We were greeted by Montoya as he asked how we were. I informed him we were not happy and we wanted to see Samuel right away. Keeping his beautiful smile he informed us that Samuel did not work at this branch but he was sure he could help us. Well exactly which branch is he at? We wish to be serviced by Samuel!! Samuel who Ma'am? I will be glad to find him for you. "Samuel Jackson" I declare. He looks astonished. I now have the attention of the woman at the next window. Montoya and her both say Samuel L. Jackson? Well.... YES. She now turns to Montoya and says, "Yes which branch is he at? I will be going there." EXACTLY! I say to her. We are both now staring at Montoya whose expression has turned to one of disbelief with a hint of humor. "He just does our commercials, Ladies." Well he can just come help us! "He does not do that." The other woman says, "he should!"  We giggle, Montoya assures us that he will inform management of our displeasure and he is positive they will do everything in their limited power to rectify the situation. Very well! Thank you. We continue to attend to our banking business and as I am about to go through the door I turn and say, "Montoya! you alone were worth the visit!" He smiles and waves. 

Am I the only one who is aware Samuel is asking me about my wallet and that he is much scarier than a herd of armed Vikings! 

Speaking of Samuel....

On August 9 1751 Samuel Prescott was born. He grew up in Concord Massachusetts and soon became an express courier for the Sons of Liberty, a group of dissidents who formed to protect the rights of the colonists.  The Sons of Liberty is the group responsible for the Boston Tea Party in 1773. He also was an express courier for the Committees of Correspondence, which were shadow governments organized by the Patriot Leaders of the 13 colonies. 

                                                   William Dawes

 On April 18 1775 William Dawes and Paul Revere, who were also couriers were dispatched to warn that the British were indeed coming and they planned to capture John Hancock, Samuel Adams and seize the military weapons and supplies stored in Concord. At about 1:00 AM  in the morning on April 19 Samuel Prescott came across the other two couriers along the road on their way to Concord having just left Lexington where he had been having a lover's tryst with his girlfriend at a local tavern. The three of them had stoped by Hartwell's Tavern to refresh their horses and themselves and were ambushed while there by the British when Paul Revere was taken prisoner. Both Dawes and Prescott after wrestling free of their captures headed for their horses and fled into the countryside where they were familiar with the local forests and back- country trails. At one point they split up so that with luck one of them might at least get through to Concord. Within a few hours Dawes heard the warning bells ringing from Concord and realized that Samuel Prescott had made it to Concord with the warning. 

                                                                          Paul Revere by John Singleton Copley

Samuel Prescott's 16th Great Grand Father, Sir William de Ros is my 24th Great Grand Uncle. Samuel Prescott is my cousin and he is celebrated for his bravery every year in Concord at a Ball at midnight where he arrives on horseback and hands men dressed as Colonial militia a note that is read to the crowd. 

Paul may have started that ride but Samuel finished it! I suppose the real gratitude should go to his girlfriend. If it had not been for her, he would not have been out on the road that night. Paul would have still been captured and William Dawes may have just gone on home. Concord would not have been warned, Samuel Adams captured and today there would be no Samuel Adams Cream Stout to drink.  No jokes about "signing your John Hancock" when asked to sign a document.  Maybe no declaration of Independence  at all! We should celebrate Samuel Prescott's Girlfriend Day!!! Yes!!! Every April 18 should be Happy Lydia Day! 

oh yeah..... her name was Lydia