Pirate Stede in the Hood!

Sorry your mom is not well. I hope that works out for her. Was a text I got from a friend?? UH???? You hope what works out? That her sickness works out and she dies? That her wellness works out? What the bloody hell does that mean???  What?? The more I think about this the more fussed up I am getting. Oh your Aunt Bertie was in a freak accident with a pancake and the toaster and now her skin is avocado colored green and her hair fell out? Sorry I hope that works out for her! What the bloody hell!!! He has all the finesse, grace and emotions of a sea urchin!

Have not spoken to him in days. Feels OK and now that I am thinking about it maybe this is who the dream was about. Actually I am fairly sure of it.

Have any of you watched Ghost Adventures from 2011? 

There is this one episode where they are chatting with a female ghost and she allegedly says "they are strong or they look strong" after Zac says he feels like someone has grabbed his hands. His arms move down and out away from his body as though they are being manipulated by someone who is looking at his arms. Like when you were younger and your grandmother would grab you by the arms pull them and exclaim "my how you have grown!" That is what it looks like happens to his arms. Zac thinks she is telling them all that look strong. I disagree. She is telling Zac that his arms look strong. I say this because that is the third 'thing I notice about a man. His arms. I do not care about a "six pack" or his V or his package, I want to see a man's arms, shoulders, and his back. I want to see his strength. It is my preference and I have always felt this way. The reason I chose team Jacob over team Edward. They had strength.

I have discovered a new insult. You lumpish, half-blooded, dullard. LOVE it!!

I mentioned the kin that lived on the island of Barbados recently and guess who their neighbor was? The famous pirate Stede Bonnet born in 1688 on Barbados, he died in 1718. He got all caught up with Blackbeard and his ship and crew were pirated away by Blackbeard. He lived in the same parish, was about the same age and was having a child when my kin were. My guess is they knew each other and dear old Uncle Evan Pearis had a ship called Greysberry.

                                              Stede Bonnet

In 1718 Stede was in South Carolina when famous pirate hunters captured him and he was arrested and sentenced to death. He died 1718. 

Great great great..... Grandfather Pearis has been said to have been a pirate judge in South Carolina at this time. He was not present at Stedes trial though. Hopefully I will get to the truth and the heart of this pirate adventure in the next few months.

                                       The hanging of pirate Stede Bonnet in Charleston, 1718

Back to Barbados now!

DETHRONE THE DAIRY QUEEN

I am going to admit right now that I have lost my mind. I would have sworn I had started a letter and then saved it to my desktop to continue later but after a 20 minute search through my computer I cannot find it. I will start a new one with mild trepidation and a sense of failure. Will I lose this one too? Is this not really happening? How many other things have imagined?

While at dinner Monday night with Mom she decides it is coffee time and so she pulls out the coffee, pours the water and turns on the pot. After a few minutes the aroma of toasted hazelnut wafts through her apartment.  She looks over at me with a huge grin and declares that the coffee is done. Shall we? She asks as we get up and head to the kitchen. She sets out her favorite cup and the one I prefer to use and hands me the cream. I pour cream into the cup followed by coffee and go back into the living room and sit down, cozy up for one of her favorite shows Castle. From the kitchen I hear a panicky “OHHHH!!!!” and mother turns around grabs a rag, turns back around, I then hear the coffee pot being moved. The next thing is Mom saying “what is going on?” in a very confused tone. Mom! What are you doing? What happened? She backs up from the coffee pot with a mixture of panic, sadness and puzzlement on her face. Mom!!?  “The coffeepot is not working” she exclaims. “I know I filled it full of water but there is just a half a pot now. Where is the coffee?” Let me add right here that Mom’s coffee pot is very small it makes about 2 cups of coffee. Mother!! I have already poured my cup. Remember you handed me the cream. She pauses, looks at me looks at the pot and then proceeds to stick her tongue out at me like a little child, shakes her head and giggles. “Don’t tell your brother” she says as she laughs. No I am thinking, he will take your car keys and start calling you three times a day.

There I am filling my car with gas, which I happen to believe is man-work, and out of the corner of my eye I see a woman walking through the gas station parking lot. As I turn I am shocked to see a cigarette in her hand. I stop the pump, put it back in its cradle, get in the car and drive off. In my mind I can see the entire gas station being engulfed in flame and explosions popping through the air like popcorn as all of the cars still there catch fire, convulse, and erupt into balls of flame. The vision is so real I can feel adrenalin and panic swamp me. I realize as I drive away that I have braced and tensed for….. Nothing happened. (More of that lost my mind thing?)

One last thing my beloved comrades. My nephew Crispin has been working a second job at Dairy Queen. My daughter had gone to Vegas for the weekend. Crispin was going to pick her up at the airport. He informed his supervisor at work that he would need a few hours off to go to the airport pick her up and come back. They told him no he could not go. Well that was not their best move. I am afraid Dairy Queen Dullards that you fail to understand the concept of family. Check your Medici family history. 

They were family. You do not tell any member of this family that they cannot do something, that you will not allow them to do something. The boys have been brought up to defend, protect and guard the girls for the whole of their lives. They execute this duty very well and take the role seriously. Crispin promptly removed his hat, told them he would be picking up his cousin, and left. They told him not to come back. His last comment to them was, “I was not planning on it!” This has led to …. Can you guess? Yep we are now in a full stage boycott of Dairy Queen. Join with us!!

DETHRONE THE DAIRY QUEEN!!!!  

Creeper Day

I went to HEB this morning to grab some stuff to make vegetable lasagna in a Béchamel sauce for dinner 

and there were people in the parking lot just sitting in their cars. The store was open and they were in their cars. When I came back out a couple were still there and some were gone and new car sitters had taken their place. What is going on?

I also noticed it was creepy old men at the grocery store day. I came across 3 very creepy guys. Very. 1 spoke and said good morning the other two looked at me pretty much like was an elk and they were panthers and thinking about a way to take me down and not in an, I want a date kind of way.  Creepy. 

I have several events to get create for the Chamber, a news article to write, and a Gala to instigate. 

Gotta Go!

Wait one more thing... the Bourbon Pecan Coffee at World Market is mine!! Do not touch it people. All you "bought all the pumpkin coffee" people stay away from the Bourbon Pecan. I ain't palyin'!!!!

Garbage Can Person

Ever have one of those days were you just cannot seem to focus. Yeah, that is me today. I am unfocused and antsy. I feel I should be anticipating something but I cannot remember what it is so it is also being tainted with a bit of confusion. Maybe it was the dream which I awoke from surprised I had been asleep. The dream was so very real and beautifully colorful. I believe the time was near sunset, dusk, it was still light out but the sun was setting. The sky was purple and lavender not much orange or yellow. There were darker purple clouds strung across the sky. Not the small or even large fluffy but the long lines of clouds that resemble fibers that are woven and then have been undulating thereby creating what looks like waves in a fabric.

 The interpretation indicates I will have difficulties of a romantic nature. It gets even better, the clouds are telling me that I will need courage and determination to get through some unhappiness and disappointment and the purple streaks are a premonition of a happy social event.  Well that is nice since I am NOT romantically involved with anyone. There is also going to be a change of residence and it will be better than this one. Bloody Hell!! What if this means my home is going to burn down, my cats are going to die and I will have to find another place to live. Arrrghhhh!!!!!!

And, here we go…..

                                                        maryriotjane.deviantart.com

Mother calls me up and leaves the following voice mail…”remember that cancer that was on my leg, well it is a cell root and they have scheduled me for surgery. They have to go in deep and get it. There will be stitches and I can't do anything for 14 days.” What cancer? I know nothing of cancer. I can see now that she back to her old ways of not telling the “kids” anything.   I call her back and there is no answer. I call my brother and he knows nothing either. Again, what cancer?  What is a cell root?  Looking back at the dream, some of this makes a little more sense. I wait until I can talk with her.

On another note… As I was out running errands today I got in my car to back out of my parking space. In front of me was a large red truck and a woman sitting inside pretending not to look at me. She starts her truck and waits. I start up, buckle up the seat belt, she is still waiting. I rearrange my purse on the seat and look at my cell phones and still she sits there. I back up and start to drive off when who comes pulling her truck through the spot I just vacated and drives off. Red truck woman. I have to wonder, how long would she have sat there? What if I had gotten back out of my car and walked to a different store? Would she still be there?

Earlier I am in the store and hear this woman in a loud voice chatting with a man in what sounds like a domestic discussion. Not angry or heated just he saying what about this or that and she is declining his choices. It is all very civil and I am beginning to feel a bit sorry for him.  Finally he comments that she does not like anything he does and he is not sure he can help with decisions. A different female voice chimes in very softly, that I cannot hear but the response is from the louder more dominant woman is, “I am not really a garbage can person anyways.” What!!?? Really?? What does that mean? 

What is a garbage can person? Are there really garbage can people. I felt a little bad when I actually burst out laughing. Yes I did that. What the bloody hell is a garbage can person? Did she mean she does not care what kind of garbage can he buys? She is just not into deciding what contains the trash in the back yard? He is so screwed. 

If he buys the black one she will not be happy yet if he buys the green one she will not be happy and yet she has just declared that she is not a garbage can person. Once home it will matter. I assume it was a mother that was with them. Years from now as they are in discussions with their respective divorce attorneys and are asked “what was the pivotal moment you knew it was not going to work out”? I hope they come across this letter somewhere and remember it all started because she was not a garbage can person.

Still no phone call going through to Mother. I will try again tomorrow.

I went to bed last night thinking I would like to get up to see the Blood Moon Eclipse. I awoke at 4:05 this morning and thought I still had an hour and a half until eclipse time and would loive to go back to sleep but that was not to be. So I got up and walked 1.7 miles and then made tea and waited and there was no moon. Lots of clouds, no moon and then a break in the clouds and a tiny sliver of the eclipsed moon winked and then clouds again. I would like to say I am disappointed but I actually got to see a probably creepier version of it all cloud covered and mysterious.

I have a two meetings today so I must prepare.

 J quit trying to put me in your preconceived box. I will not fit and it just frustrates you. Then you shut down and all communication is terminated. If you pull the wings off of a butterfly to see how they work it is no longer a butterfly and you have killed it. 

It Was Our Island

I have discovered what Scarlet was chasing in the window. Again today she is starring and stalking the window. Then all of a sudden she leapt up on the curtain clinging to it with just her claws. I looked and discovered nothing, nothing but the shadows of birds that are outside sitting and flitting along the fence by the sidewalk. The fence is about 10 feet from the window and the sun is casting a shadow that then gets distorted through a screen, glass and wrinkly textured sheer curtain. I can tell by the way her tail is swishing that it is driving her bonkers. She again is sitting starring at the window.

Query to George Parris and Shay McNeal – Between 1680 and 1718 a man who went by the names of Edward Teach, Edward Thatch, Edward Tack, and Edward Thack, perhaps even Edward Drummond and Blackbeard; was a Pirate and created those fictitious surnames.  It is not even known if Edward was his real first name. None of these names sound the same. Blackbeard was an intelligent man who could read and write. Why do you both assume that Pearis is a made up name to hide the piracy of family members whose real last name is allegedly Parris, or Paris? You claim the Pearis Pirates were intelligent yet you make them appear dim witted by having them simply change the spelling of their real last name. Alexander Pearis, Paris, Parris is still Alexander Pearis. It sounds no different. How obscure can they make themselves by simply changing the spelling?  I have asked for answers, proof of the research/ facts   from both of you before and have received none. Your hypothesis make no sense. If I were going to create a fictitious name for myself I would certainly not merely change the spelling. Neither did other Pirates for example Henry Every, John Avery, Long Ben, also known as Benjamin Bridgeman from 1694. In 1719 Edward Seegar was Edward England, Edward Low became Ned Low, and the list goes on.

Pearis is probably a made up name, with Paris or Parris being used as well. At this point I am not sure what the real name is. 

There is a street fair or school fair or something going on at the Christian school behind my home. They are playing music loud enough to be heard in Mississippi. I swear it is the same song over and over. I am about to lose my mind. It is like they are stuck in a bad music loop spun by a DJ who is tone deaf, lacks creativity and talent. STOP!!!

I bumped into a will written in 1714 by a window named Sarah Smith in St. Georges Parish, Barbados. In it she mentions an Alexander Parris who had married her daughter Elizabeth. She also mentions their 6 children. What I also discovered was there was also a George and Thomas who along with Alexander wrote their names sometimes as Paris, Pearis and Parris.

More exploring on this for later.

An Alexander Pearis was the owner of an island called Pearis Island on the coast of South Carolina. Does that sound familiar? Maybe if I spell it Parris Island.  Marine Corps Recruit Depot Parris Island is an 8,095 acres military installation located within Port Royal, South Carolina. Yes, that Parris Island was ours once upon a time. It was Pearis Island. It was changed to Parris.

I was nearly killed by a coocaroacha Saturday night. No lie! It tried to kill me. Instead it is now dead. I left it out on my front grassy area as a warning to other encroaching and evil bugs that invasions and attempts at hostile take-overs will be dealt with swiftly and violently. I have a shoe by my door with your names on it bugs!!!

I have to call my mom now!

Adverb is NOT a Definition

Do I like having my letters responded to? Yes. However sending me “proof” that irregardless is a word in a sentence like what I am about to quote is at best humorous… she responded with

 “I said it does have a definition it is an Adverb even if it is a non-standard one.

Thanks Sara”

This is exactly what Merriam-Webster says:

ir·re·gard·less adverb  ir-i-ˈgärd-ləs

Definition of IRREGARDLESS ( there is not one, it is blank, seriously nothing there!)

nonstandard:  regardless

So Sara says in her comment that the definition of irregardless is adverb. 

Uh… an adverb is “a word or phrase that modifies or qualifies an adjective, verb, or other adverb or a word group, expressing a relation of place, time, circumstance, manner, cause, degree, etc.” Adverbs are used to modify verbs. Such as He ran yesterday. The adverb being yesterday. He ran quickly. The adverb being quickly. Again I say adverb is not a definition it is a type of word that has a specific function in a sentence like a noun or verb.

Notice the first part of her response? “I said it does….” Sounds like a mother lecturing her children. I know it is you talking Sara, I know what you said… I have sadly come to the conclusion that my dear friend Sara whom by the way I do like uses the non-word irregardless and was insulted that I implied it was considered simple-minded. Well, Sara darling it is a non-standard word that actually has no definition. The two negatives in the word cancelling each other out and making the word just simply mean regard. This was all in my letter. So without further regard for your e-mail I have deleted your reply and this debate with you is OVER.

Maybe I could hook her up with the X husband and they can be irregardless of each other.

I just got a message from twitter telling me I have a new follower. I take a look and well you judge for yourself. He wants me to pay him $29 to get me 5,000 followers and so on and so on up to $219 for 100,000 followers. But that is not all. his profile photo is a guy in a white shirt lying on a rumpled bed wearing sunglasses. REALLY!!!! Very professional!! I would trust him with my money… NOT!!!  My guess is this scammer will be gone from the site in less than 2 days. 

This reminds me of the $500 I gave that guy in San Jose who was the boy-toy of a friend. I got $120 back from the loan. HEY!!! Boy-toy dude!! Where’s my money!! Picture Jason Statham asking. Listen to this Where's My Money - The Sound Of Dubstep 2010.

I am off to pay rent speaking of someone asking for money….

Irregardless Job

People!! I have had enough, irregardless of what some of you feel, think or believe is right, it is NOT!!! Irregardless is NOT a word. NO NO NO. I had a mate that used that word all the time as though he thought it made him seem more cosmopolitan, educated and well read. He came across like an uneducated buffoon!! He would use the word in social settings and I watched as people rolled their eyes and snickered at him. Yes, I mentioned it to him, no he did not receive my attempt to correct him well. He proceeded to yell and get violent all the time screaming that irregardless of what I thought, my education was obviously lacking and I was no match for his 121 IQ.  What??? Had I known that I, would have sought out a more intelligent being to donate some sperm.

I can find no definition in Merriam-Webster dictionary for this word.

Here is what the Urban Dictionary says…” Used by people who ignorantly mean to say regardless.” My thoughts exactly!!

Ir means, not. Less means, without, failure, inability to perform. We end up with not-regard-without, or inability to perform without regard. Which actually describes an abusive person.  He was able to perform his husbandly duties and fatherly duties without regard for his wife or children.

What prompted this little rant was a male creature commenting on an article and attempting to berate a woman who brought GOD into her comments about the article. He was obviously attempting to make her look stupid and in his words “sheep-like” for her faith in GOD. At least she used real words. So he came across looking like an idiot who has an insane fear of a GOD he claims not to believe in.

I am reading The Great House of God by Max Lucado as my devotional study guide. I am on the chapter The Chapel, A TIME TO BE SILENT. It is a lesson using Job. It made no sense to me a first. It reads on about all of the horrible things that happen to Job and the ridicule he takes from his friends and his wife about GOD. They say things about GOD as they each see Him and have experienced Him, about who GOD is and why GOD is punishing Job and Job replies back with all kinds of wonderful things to say about GOD and his faith in GOD and who GOD is talking and defending his GOD. Finally after this goes on for quite some time GOD speaks. GOD asks Job several questions that he cannot answer such as in chapter 38 verse 16 - Have you gone to the springs in the sea or walked through the valleys of the ocean depths? He asks many more thought provoking questions of dear old Job but this one caught my attention. At first I am not sure why GOD has interrupted his servant who was defending Him and speaking so passionately about him. I always felt GOD was angry and roared out His questions to Job in a tormenting way. I think now I am wrong. I think it was more like ‘oh you silly man. I am GOD I do not need you to defend me. I need you to have faith in me. I do everything for a perfect reason. Most of the time when others are tormenting us about GOD it is best to let GOD deal with the aspects of GOD and we just skip on down a path chasing a sparkly blue butterfly. GOD can take care of GOD.

Now what about that verse caught me.  Have you gone to the springs in the sea? He is asking Job to tell him where the beginning of the sea/oceans are. The springs in the oceans, the springs at the beginning of the rivers and creeks that feed into oceans, the beginnings of those springs or the beginnings of the springs themselves or the beginning of that beginning. It is an infinite question.  Job cannot answer that, he does not know where the beginning is. We do not know where the beginning is. Oh sure there are people that can lead you to the spring that is the beginning of the Frio river and maybe they can tell you where that spring begins and maybe how that little thing happens that causes the formation of water and so on but can they really tell you where it all began? NO!

The next part of that verse. …walked through the valleys of the ocean depths? How was Job supposed to know that there are valleys and mountains and volcanos under the seas/oceans? There had been no deep underwater exploration. For all he knew the bottom was flat like water in a bowl, or pitcher, or well. He may have known there were rocks and that it slanted downward but so does a bowl. He just told Job that for all you know, you know not much.  

Quit talking little man GOD says, I got this!