It is a brilliant answer and what, at least in my mind, is very closely associated with babies and small children. I had footie pajamas until I was about 4. My Brother wore footie pajamas until he was probably 6. My babies all had footie pajamas until they were 4.
They encase the child from head to toe giving a visual of a comforting, protective cocoon as children should be kept. As I want to be kept. Her answer is sad yet she is calm and peaceful as she says it turning her head from looking back. She lets go of what was wonderful with no fear and steps further away willingly into an unknown. It is the best few moments in the film.
I woke up thinking about that this morning and wondering what I would say today if asked that question. My answer has always been horses.
But, today I hesitated. My mind flashed to everything I have not done or experienced. Places, especially places I have not been to, Prague, Budapest,
London, Figi and a hundred more. That quickly faded into visions of what I would miss; ballet, singing, painting, being thin, having glorious strawberry blonde long shiny hair. I then realized I no longer have those things. I am no longer thin and cannot wear all the beautiful fashions. My hair is no longer strawberry or blonde or long or glorious. After 4 years of ballet we discovered my ankles are defective and I would never be the ballerina
I dreamed of becoming, as mush as I loved music I could not play the piano or guitar and my voice in song is far from lovely or pleasing and my voice coach was so frustrated. I never could paint how I saw things in my mind or even how they looked to me in reality and I became incredibly discouraged, my art master still believed in me but maybe she needed the money. I cannot afford a horse and due to the injuries I received in a horrible fall I cannot ride. So I cannot possibly miss those things either when I am gone because I do not have them. I am left with a terrifying truth. I will not miss anything and if there is nothing to miss does that mean I have done and been all I was meant to and is it time for me to leave?
Ponder that for a wee bit.... I have to go make breakfast for my children and get them out the door.
It has been several days since I wrote this and later that day something drastically changed in my world. I was called into a meeting by the Executive Board
where I am employed part time and told that they had hired our Contracted Account Executive to be our Executive Director and I would work for him. I would hand everything over to him and my few hours would become even fewer hours because now they had to pay his salary. I smiled and paused and then asked if I could break this down. You want to take money from me to pay him and then I am supposed to call him boss? Insult on top of injury? Yes they say. Again I smile and inform them that I am NOT OK with this. Well that is how it is, was the response. They are giving me until Monday to make my decision. This was Thursday afternoon.....
An angel walks beside me, my job was my footie pajama, it is all of our footie pajamas. Our security, our means to provide not only for ourselves but others in and out of our circle. I glance back. What will I miss the most?
I take hold of the Angles hand and flip my long strawberry blonde hair while adjusting my tutu and ask; can we get on those horses and run?
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