Avocado Slice

My great grand Aunt was married to Fielding Rose. What else do you name a man who has Rose as a Surname?

Much to my amazement and humor my great grand Aunt Eliza and uncle Alonzo lived for a very short time in Ottumwa Iowa. Some of you may recall the TV series M.A.S.H. and the beloved Radar.  

This fictional character Corporal Walter Eugene "Radar" O’Reilly was from Ottumwa Iowa and spoke of home often during the running of the show. I have been to Ottumwa and we were told that though he had been invited to Grand Marshal Parades and for other events the actor who played Radar had never been to Ottumwa.

The Des Moines River runs through the city which at the last census had a population of just a wee bit over 25,000.  In 1851 the town was seriously damaged by flooding. In 1857 coal was being mined 4 miles west of Ottumwa and by 1889 there were a reported 15 mines in and around the city. By 1914 one mining company in the Ottumwa area was producing over 100,000 tons of coal a year.  5 Presidents have visited and the

 “Loose-Meat” sandwiches which were served in the cafe by Roseanne in the TV show were based on a sandwich served in a cafe in Ottumwa called the Canteen.  Actor Tom Arnold was born in Ottumwa.

The knife was poised above the avocado and just as I was slicing I realized my finger was in the way. Have you ever had an explosion of several thoughts all go off at the same moment inside your head? This is probably why tragedy seems to happen in slow motion. Here is what I recall… My finger was in the path the knife was set to cut….

1.    Stop the downward motion of the knife

2.    Move your finger

3.    I am about to cut my own flesh

4.    There will be blood on the knife

5.    Will it get on the avocado

6.    This is going to be painful in a moment

7.    I hate Band-Aids

As I attempted to stop one hand from slicing and one finger to move I felt the slightly serrated edge of the knife tear across my finger. It felt like the whole process took about 17 minutes to happen but after it had happened it seemed so quick. The “stop slicing” and “move your finger” were an equal order from my brain which I recall being screamed out loud so the neighbors could hear but, were probably silent. I am not sure.

There was no blood on the knife or the avocado. It seems I threw the knife in the sink and ripped off a sheet paper towel from the roll like a bullfighter twirling as the bull passes. Ole`

I must get the photos from the Veteran’s Day Parade edited and sent to my editor.

Have a great accident free day!