Air Bender

Our Gala theme this year is Holiday on 5^th Avenue A Red and Black Affair. We get to create the menu so I have been looking for inspiration from restaurants in Manhattan. I spent about 20 minutes looking. I wonder how long it will take for google to assume I am going to New York and start feeding me ads about it? This could be annoying and it could be helpful. Maybe a few more searches on my own and google will start helping. I know I had mentioned meat once on facebook and they overwhelmed me with ads and photographs of all kinds of raw meat, cooked meat, hunting trios, it was disgusting. Finally a friend suggested I looked for castles in France that cater to Lesbian vegetarians. You know what? That worked. No more meat. I did get a few castle suggestions and they kept suggesting Melissa Eathridge but at least there was no more meat. Yeah!!!

My granddaughter is here with me. I picked her up last night. She is not here a lot so she did not remember Goblins name so I told her when she asked “what is that?” and pointed at him. Goblin “Globin?” hahah  sure honey call him Globin. Well G-man was having nothing to do with that. He sauntered off looking insulted. She was not the least insulted by his rude behavior. She followed him around trying to show him her telescope she had made with a toilet paper role. I had finally had enough. “G, you stop and look at her telescope!!” He stopped he turned and looked right at me and grumbled out a reeeowwwr. He looked at her telescope he sniffed the end. She was so excited. “Globlin likes my telescope!” yes he does. I was surprised he stopped. Like he understood, weird, If I am out of catfood and need to go to the store I tell him I am out and am leaving to go to the store he just glares and sits in front of his bowl grumbling like he does NOT understand.  Do you think he has selective hearing like a teenager?

SO there I was doing my morning Tai Chi when I felt a tickle in my nose. I ignored I was in Zen mode. It is just me, Johnny Depp and GOD. I am an air bender. It is great, or was right up until I was moving cloud hands, big sneeze, wild horse, sneeze, catch and strike, sneeze, Whip,  sneeze-sneeze, catch and strike, sneeze and by the time I moved the mountain I was off balance and out of my rhythm. Laughing, laughing very hard.  Johnny was just grinning. GOD was giggling. I was done.

I have come to the conclusion that Lady Tamara  www.LairdOfLochaber.com has dominion over one small spider and he was staging a revolt. He challenged me in the kitchen not once but twice. I chased him away and he disappeared into a cabinet. Well I was not about to go look for him. Later he had staked out a spot midway up a door jamb and was lurking. I lecture him on his responsibilities and the fact that he is to be outside not inside. He refuses to budge. Now mind you he is downstairs by a door that opens to Harry Potter’s room. I go on about my evening and after several hours prepare for bed and as I am brushing my teeth, upstairs in my bathroom little spider man crawls out from behind my toothpaste basket and stares at me with a triumphant gleam. I finish calmly brushing, I glare back, I pick up my glass of water and pour it on him, I turn on the water over the sink and after rinsing my mouth I tell him…”you were warned peasant!!! Be gone!” The last time I saw him he was going down the drain.

Anyone care to join me this morning for some more air-bending? Johnny will be there.