Love my choices

Good Morning,

I am fussed up and trying to control an anxiety eruption. I just had the oil in my car changed a few weeks ago. He was running fine. I could smell hot oil whenever I would turn him off but I assumed it was from the oil change and the flush they did and from whatever oil may have landed on the engine and not in the engine. This has been the case before. However now Charles is making a terrible clacking sound and the oil light which has never been on before has popped on. It looks like a little 1920 oil can, how cute; except that if the light is on the problem to cause it to be on is already far advanced.

  Do I call my brother and stress him out. Take it back to the shop that changed it, not that I trust them now.  This was not in my plan of events, this was not in my budget, and this is not what I scheduled my day to be like. It is supposed to be cold, rainy, icy, thunderstorm raging weather out today. I was going to work from home to avoid any traffic situations. Yes this is the beauty of working from home I can take care of unscheduled events. Yes I love adventure and escapades and trysts but this one is a scary one in that what if there has been some horrible damage done to my car, irreparable damage to the engine. I can neither afford a repair or a new car purchase. I have lived in dread of this day; not that I know yet what this day is.

This brings me strangely, to a fine example of how we are not really in control of our lives, our choices, mistakes (that always makes me laugh). If I am in control of the choices I make then why, muggles why would I choose this? Having this unknown stress is not my choice. I did not wake up yesterday and decide I wanted my car to have the oil light pop on.  I had no control over this. My only choice is how to react to this. My choice is to tell you about it and that perhaps during the telling I will see some way through my reaction. I will see some part of this I did not. I will take the fear out of the equation by telling of my fears.  I am afraid it is a serious thing that will cost a lot of money which I do not have.

  As far as venturing out in the weather that is just another spree, a chance to discover treasure, a reason to take Moola along and shoot some photos for her page.

I am looking at my antique coal hod which sits to the side of my fireplace.

 I keep most of my collection of pinecones in it. It needs more pine comes.  I wish I could remember where each one came from but it is rather hard to tag them or mark them. I just enjoy them.

What will happen to you today that will demonstrate you do not choose? If I had a choice I would choose this car

 and this man as my personal mechanic.

 Just saying…..